Bacon

Ok.  It's time to introduce a special someone to the blog.  Everyone, meet Dahn Tu.

Dahn works with me.  She's a very small Vietnamese woman with a very thick accent. Known by many for her athletic abilities, Dahn is very involved with our internal wellness initiatives at the office. She's taught several classes and boot camps.

Dahn is opinionated and happy to tell you her opinion on any topic. I once remember listening to an in-depth discussion between her and someone else on staff about how women shouldn't be allowed to run for President. Women are too emotional, she said. Then, she went on to explain (in great detail) how women could run FEMA though. She even went through the ice drop off process she envisioned. The person she was discussing this with was not in agreement and I remember enjoying the two of them (both headstrong women) arguing their case.

Dahn has regularly talked to me about my weight. "Why you so fat?" she asks. "Don't chu say you go ecursize ehvwe day? What chi do deer?"

I use to be shocked by her bluntness. I explained to her my routine once, "I work out at the gym down the street..... I like to swim..."

"Swim. See dat's u problem."

"Huh? What is?"

"You go to gym?"

"Yes."

"And, you swim?"

"Right?" I am not sure what she's getting at.

"Well, you not sweat. You in air condition, den you in water. You not sweat. You need to do dis. Net time you go to gym don't go in. Walk around parking lot till you get lots of sweat."

Ok. Let me see if I get this. She wants me to drive to the gym, but not go in? Just park and walk around the parking lot? Should I keep my membership for that? I know sweating is helpful, but people who swim do actually burn calories.

"What chu eat after chu ecersize?" Dahn asks.

"I usually have bran flakes," I said. This was a pre-box conversation.

"Oh no," she says disgusted. "Dat so bad. Chu need to eat bacon. Bacon help chu lose weight."

BACON? Really?

"I need to eat bacon to lose weight?" I asked.

"Lots ah bacon. Big breakfast. Eggs. Bacon. But, lots ah bacon."

If I start eating bacon in the mornings I will be 400 pounds. I know how my body works. Bacon isn't going to make me thin.

From that conversation on, everytime I see Dahn she asks me if I'm eating bacon yet.

Today I'm almost 30 pounds lighter. I saw her earlier this week. She looks me up and down. She notices a difference. Dahn says, "Looks like chu been eaten bacon!"